Porter Haney


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Born in the Heart of the Rockies, Porter Haney is no stranger to the mountains. Whisked from the bread basket of fourteen thousand foot mountains, straight to the icy climes of northern New England, he quickly sought out the densest skiing New Hampshire could offer.

Once, in Baffin Island, he caught a wild salmon with a magnifying glass, cunning, and determination, then trained it to hunt down and retrieve smaller fish for his sustenance.

Known for his innate ability to withstand the coldest of waters, Porter has been sighted swimming off the coast of Baja, and regularly bathes in frigid Chilean waters for his health.

He has logged more than 366.333 consecutive days (repeating of course) with at least one face shot, and has perfected the art of skiing rock faces devoid of snow.

As a Freelance Mexican Food Architect, he has been awarded the first Michelin star in the discipline. He has the kind of culinary intuition that cannot be learned or taught.

His nacho towers reach the height of two-story buildings, and his Green Chile set off both fire and flavor alarms.

His mustaches make women weak in the knees, and even weaker in the heart.

As a youngster, he drove sweaty back from Whitefish to Wyoming, then from Stowe to Snowbird, just to see where the best schussing was. As an adult, the schussing has learned to follow him instead.

His Carhartt double-fronts haven’t been washed since he bought them 8 years ago. They smell of jasmine and determination.

His resolve is the stuff of legends.

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Porter lives in Salt Lake City, UT and is the head Green Chile Curator for FamousInternetSkiers.com.

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